What Teachers Ask Me About PDA: Real Questions From the Classroom
I’m often invited into schools to talk about PDA in order to help staff better understand what they’re seeing in the classroom and how to support the children they work with.
And while every setting is different, the questions I’m asked are often very similar.
They come from a place of care, curiosity, and sometimes… feeling a bit stuck.
So I thought I’d share some of the most common ones here, in case they help bring a bit of clarity, or reassurance, to your own classroom.
“What actually is PDA?”
This is always the starting point.
PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance) is a profile within autism, where a child has an intense need to avoid everyday demands, even things they might want or need to do.
In school, this can look like:
refusing or avoiding tasks
appearing oppositional
disengaging or shutting down
becoming overwhelmed quickly
But underneath it isn’t a behaviour choice.
It’s a nervous system response to feeling under pressure or lacking autonomy.
“But they can do it sometimes… so why not all the time?”
This is one of the biggest sticking points.
A child with a PDA profile can do many things, but only when their nervous system feels safe enough.
Capacity isn’t fixed. It changes depending on:
anxiety levels
perceived demand
environment
relationships
So what looks like inconsistency is often actually fluctuating capacity.
“How do I get them to follow instructions?”
This is where we often need to gently shift the goal.
With PDA, the focus moves from compliance to collaboration.
Strategies might include:
reducing direct demands
offering choices (that feel genuine)
using indirect language
building connection before expectation
It’s less about getting a child to do something, and more about creating the conditions where they can.
“What about the rest of the class?”
This is a very real and valid concern.
Supporting a child with PDA doesn’t mean ignoring everyone else, but it does sometimes mean being flexible in how expectations are applied.
Often, what helps one child (reduced pressure, more autonomy, stronger relationships) benefits others too.
And small shifts can make a big difference without needing to overhaul everything.
“It feels like they’re in control, how do we manage that?”
This is something I hear a lot.
When a child is avoiding demands, it can feel like they’re trying to take control of the situation.
But what’s usually happening is the opposite.
They’re trying to regain a sense of safety and autonomy when something feels overwhelming.
Reframing this can help:
from “they’re controlling the classroom”
to “they’re trying to feel safe in it”
“What should we do when things escalate?”
In those moments, the priority shifts. It’s no longer about the task, it’s about regulation.
That might look like:
reducing language
lowering expectations
giving space
staying calm and predictable
Trying to push through in that moment often increases distress.
“Are we getting it wrong?”
This is often the quiet question underneath everything else.
And the answer is rarely simple, and often what’s going wrong for these children is about the whole school environment and not just one teacher.
Most teachers I work with are doing their best in systems that weren’t designed with this profile in mind.
Understanding PDA is a long and continuing process. It’s about noticing, adjusting, and learning what works for each individual child.
But it can make a huge difference to each child, and others in your school too, and make schools a safer environment for all types of brains, which is something I know all schools want to see.
A final thought
Every time I go into a school, I’m reminded how much care there is in the room.
These questions don’t come from a lack of effort, they come from wanting to understand.
And that’s always the most important place to start.
